mix: mornings
slowdive spanish air tropic of cancer be brave (wtf video) burial stolen dog purity ring lofticries shlohmo sippy cup
mornings are impossible for me. unfortunately i am one of those who will forgo breakfast and makeup for an extra 30 minutes of sleep. i adore the triumph of swiping one's finger across the snooze button: ...ah, time is still on my side.
but, alas, the magic dwindles quickly with each successive swipe until only dregs remain. on my last wish, i make an attempt to rise and it's a slow unfurl--shifting a foot from under the comforter, stretching fingers overhead in lattice form, opening my eyes wide towards the ceiling.
in another five minutes, i'll be up.
but i'm never truly awake in the morning until i make the walk to school with music in my ears. the world seems all too familiar and mundane otherwise. unlike coffee which jars me into anxiety, good music is an easy passage into reality, cushioning the moments when dreams subside under warmth sunlight and, later, the hushed hallways of my school. it tinges the world anew, adds in a dash more gradient, infuses cracks in the scenery with intrigue and becomings.
girl
i am so unmotivated when my props aren't in order. a reordered watercolor box (true to nature, my old one was lost in my very home) and a beautiful field sketchbook have incited my newest surge of visual outputs. i will try to update this blog more often.
the medium is still new. i use it like i would acrylic or oil. must improve.
fall/winter blues
winter closet + dieppa restrepo lavender cali + boy by band of outsiders seersucker shirt
the shirt
perfect blue
seersucker material ≠ ironing
3/4 sleeves ≠ habitual sleeve rolling
cooling ≠ sweaty run to school everyday
comfortable, boxy slouch
when i left his apartment that day, i walked down three sets of dusty click-lit steps. then through a shaded hallway with dripping floors and down a stone staircase. he must have been behind me but i couldn't hear him through the roars of my luggage wheels. i waved to the gateman, who for once was not slumbering, and stepped outside the gates to greet a busy morning street.
so, so different from that one quiet summer dawn, when i woke up at 5 am to walk with him to the town's edge and the haze had faded everything to cold neutral and i couldn't believe how small his town was to be surrounded by such endless cloud-wreathed mountains. and we had both kept silent in comfortable companionship in what seemed like a suspended place and time.
but that day, as i was leaving for the final time, everything was as i came: people, buses, cars in never-ending traffic cacophony, like a million jeweled bugs gone crazy in the sun and humidity. i closed my eyes and time folded, how could two months stand between two identical settings, and then it quickened to spite me: he stepping to my side and yelling down a cab. and i putting the suitcase in the trunk and shut. there was just a moment before i closed the door and waved goodbye.
on some hot summer days, on some street corners, if i'm lucky, if the heat and gasoline smells and car honks mix just right, i would recapture that moment of splitting between his world and mine. i wanted to hug him, an altogether foreign and modern gesture (so i didn't). i wanted to tell him, tactlessly, 爷爷，我永远爱你 (but i just nodded and smiled weakly). time waits for no one, a lesson i need relearning and can only remember in desperation. remember: my body dragging my heart into the car; in the back window, seeing his small figure disappearing into the crowd.
so, so different from that one quiet summer dawn, when i woke up at 5 am to walk with him to the town's edge and the haze had faded everything to cold neutral and i couldn't believe how small his town was to be surrounded by such endless cloud-wreathed mountains. and we had both kept silent in comfortable companionship in what seemed like a suspended place and time.
but that day, as i was leaving for the final time, everything was as i came: people, buses, cars in never-ending traffic cacophony, like a million jeweled bugs gone crazy in the sun and humidity. i closed my eyes and time folded, how could two months stand between two identical settings, and then it quickened to spite me: he stepping to my side and yelling down a cab. and i putting the suitcase in the trunk and shut. there was just a moment before i closed the door and waved goodbye.
on some hot summer days, on some street corners, if i'm lucky, if the heat and gasoline smells and car honks mix just right, i would recapture that moment of splitting between his world and mine. i wanted to hug him, an altogether foreign and modern gesture (so i didn't). i wanted to tell him, tactlessly, 爷爷，我永远爱你 (but i just nodded and smiled weakly). time waits for no one, a lesson i need relearning and can only remember in desperation. remember: my body dragging my heart into the car; in the back window, seeing his small figure disappearing into the crowd.
three, korean cinema
The Classic (2003)
The movie itself is a bit melodramatic and the ending is too neat for my taste, but i do love the music.
Deli Spice - 고백 (The Confession)
Attack the Gas Station (1999)
Shell - 작은 사랑 (A Little Love)
Le Transperceneige (2012)
 |
"In a post-apocalyptic world, or what's remaining of it after a world war and glaciation, the few survivors find themselves in Earth's last remaining train, named Transperceneige. The train continues to move following a circle in a desert of snow and ice. And, while the poorest live in pathetic conditions, suffering the cold and hunger, those living in the 'premium class' lust, party and live like Kings. The Transperceneige continues to travel in this vicious circle, but one day one of the 'miserables', Proloff, decides to change status quo, discovering all the secrets behind Earth's last train." (Source) |
------
*in other news, the japanese are making a rurouni kenshin live-action. yuu aoi as megumi? but she's too cute...and awkward. cannot wait to see soujirou though i know it will disappoint.
Little Dragon 10/29
Twice I turn my back on you
I fell flat on my face but didn't lose
Tell me where would I go
Tell me what led you on
I'd love to know
Was it the blue night
Gone fragile
Was it both men
In wonder
Steady gone under
Was it the light ways
So frightening
Was it two wills
One mirror holding us dearer now
Thought I had an answer once
But your random ways swept me along
Colossal signs so I got lost
With so many lovers singing soft
Was it the blue night
Gone fragile
Was it both men
In wonder
Steady gone under
Was it the light ways
So frightening
Was it two wills
One mirror holding us dearer now
I fell flat on my face but didn't lose
Tell me where would I go
Tell me what led you on
I'd love to know
Was it the blue night
Gone fragile
Was it both men
In wonder
Steady gone under
Was it the light ways
So frightening
Was it two wills
One mirror holding us dearer now
Thought I had an answer once
But your random ways swept me along
Colossal signs so I got lost
With so many lovers singing soft
Was it the blue night
Gone fragile
Was it both men
In wonder
Steady gone under
Was it the light ways
So frightening
Was it two wills
One mirror holding us dearer now